Goodbye Security Guard
The guard didn’t even get up when he saw me or switch off the news. I hate it when people are just rude. The Sunday news flashed a special bulletin interrupting a story on a cat that had learned how to tap dance.
“This just in- a man was found brutally murdered in his own home. More on this story at ten.”
That made me pause; they must have found him already. Then I realized they were talking about someone else in a different town that I had mauled last week. Good. I wasn’t in the mood to leave my present temporary home yet.
“What is this world coming to?” said the guard while stuffing a chocolate eclair in his mouth. I walked closer so he could see me,
“We’re closed buddy”, he said while only briefly looking up at me.
“I have a few questions to ask you”, I said.
“We’re closed”, he repeated through his open mouth full of donuts, while spitting chunks out of it. More was on the floor than in his mouth now.
“It won’t take long believe me,” I said.
“Yeah sure, look I have had a long day,” the guard grumbled.
“Really”, I said trying to sound interested, like I cared.
“Yeah I almost got mauled by a pack of vicious wolves”.
“You don’t say”, I replied unable to control my smile from spreading across my face.
“Yeah, they were about fifty of them or so, but I took them down. Too bad about the kid, though he’s probably been eaten by that wolf pack by now.”
What an idiot, I thought to myself. Wolves don’t hang out in packs as big as fifty, so either he was exaggerating or he couldn’t count.
“Tell me about the little omega,” I asked.
“Who?” asked the guard blankly?
“The kid who went missing.” I explained slowly.
“Oh him. He’s some foster reject kid that volunteers here.”
“So what’s his history?” I asked.
“Hell, I don’t know. You’d have to ask his social worker, she’s the one that got him the job here.”
He looked over at me and started at my right eye.
“Your eye. It’s ..”
“Messed up”, I said. I often forgot about my right eye until people so rudely brought it up.
“It was injured and hasn’t healed right. But I can still see out of it so what else can you tell me about him?” I asked.
“That all I can tell you.” answered the guard.
“Are you sure?” I asked slowly.
“Yes, now go so I can watch my show,” he snorted.
My smile widened.
“What the hell are you smiling about?” he asked.
“I get two meals tonight,” I said.
“What?” he stammered.
“I already had a meal earlier, but he was very skinny. It was more of an appetizer or a snack. After I get through with you I’ll be full for a week,” I said smiling.
“What?” he said with the last donut still in his mouth. He tried getting out of his chair but his butt was stuck.
The few dogs that were there started barking like crazy at first, but once I got through with him they all started whimpering and cowering in their cages trying to get out of my sight. I had been planning to eat one or two dogs also if the security guard didn’t fill me up, but he was a larger meal than I imagined.